Q&A with a Straight Male Escort

In this guest post, a veteran (straight) male escort from the the UK's straight male escort service Gentlemen-4-Hire talks about his experiences over the last 10 years escorting.

• What sort of female clientele do escorts get?

• What are these women looking for?

• Do things ever "go wrong"?

He answers these and other questions from our forum about what it's like to be an escort.

 

What perspectives or novel trends have you observed about women that you wouldn’t have seen otherwise?

Over the past ten years, I’ve felt that the stigma of being an escort has gone down. Many women tell their friends about their bookings with me. I’ve even been introduced to my clients’ friends, which would never have happened a few years back.

I’ve seen an increase in confident, independent women that look for the ease and convenience of using an escort. Many younger professional women are now not considering settling down until their mid-late 30s. They don’t like wasting time on awkward dates, so it makes sense for them to use escorts to fill this gap in their lives.

Women’s expectations of men have also increased, though. Ten years ago, they were happy enough as long as you turned up on time and had ironed your shirt. Now, women expect an escort to be very well-groomed, in great shape, have a six-pack and white teeth. So, it’s quite a commitment now to be a male escort as you have to invest more time into staying in good shape.

 

 

Do the interactions with clients feel transactional, or is there good rapport/energy generally?

It varies a lot. Some women are very nervous and can be hard work if they don’t open up, so I end up making all the conversation. Others are great, and we get on well – many I would now consider close friends.

It’s surprising how many confident, independent women want to have a good time with a man on their terms without all the emotional attachment that comes with a relationship.

Women are just ordinary people. They have a requirement that’s easier to fill with a male escort.

 

How long and how often do clients seek services?

I’ve been doing this on and off for 10 years. I have some regular clients as well as new ones that I get through gentlemen4hire.com.

When I’m looking to maximize the money, I sometimes have three to four bookings a week. Other times, it’s maybe once a week. It depends on how busy I am with other projects.

I never thought I’d be doing it this long. I only planned to try it for a few weeks when I needed some cash, but I enjoyed it and seemed to be pretty good at it, so I’ve kept going. I guess if I get married at some point, I’ll stop, but up until then, I think I’ll carry on as long as there are women out there that enjoy spending time with me!

 

What are these women’s thoughts and mindsets on dating if they’ve talked about it?

Many younger women are tired of endless dates, particularly ones from dating apps and websites. They find it too much hassle with too many weirdos out there and the inevitable awkwardness of a date with someone not their type. So, the idea of booking an escort that they like, a no-strings date that’s entirely on their terms, is refreshing.

More mature ladies tend to either still be married (and bored), or divorced, unsure about the dating world, and not interested in getting into a proper relationship. These ladies tend to appreciate the confidence and energy of a younger guy, so they really get into the date. Many of them have spent 10+ years in stale relationships, so they’re delighted to go out with a man who gives them complete attention.

 

How attractive is the average customer?

To be honest, most aren’t particularly attractive. The average age is probably 35–50. I rarely get a booking from someone that’s very unattractive, though; most are just average-looking. Maybe 1 in 10 is what I would consider attractive. Now and then, I’ll get a beauty, which is obviously a pleasant situation.

However, I don’t mind what they look like, as long as they have some manners and are lovely to talk to.

 

I guess some stunning bombshells will pay for the service. Still, the regular Jane… is she a girl who is just a little distracted with her career, or has she sacrificed her attractiveness for it?

Most women who book me are very career-minded or are slightly older and have already made their money. The career-minded ones just don’t set aside the time to do traditional dating as it’s so much effort to trawl through the apps writing to people or go to nightclubs hoping to meet someone.

Nowadays, people want convenience and everything on their terms, so male escorting fits this category. As long as they have the money, they can just click their fingers and get whatever they want.

 

Have you ever been repulsed by a customer’s physical appearance or behavior?

Appearances have not repulsed me. I’m realistic enough to realize that some women will be unattractive, and I’m okay with that.

What is terrible is if someone has bad personal hygiene. This happens occasionally and is particularly off-putting. On a couple of occasions, I’ve faked an emergency to cut a booking short because they were so unpleasant. Thankfully, this is a rare occasion.

 

Besides money, what other benefits do you get from this job?

I love meeting new people and finding out about their lives. I’ve learned so much about so many things that I would never have without this job.

It’s also a significant confidence boost that people are happy to pay you for your time, particularly those that make repeat bookings. I’ve had a few customers for years, and I view them more as friends now.

It also keeps me motivated to keep fit and look after myself!

 

What kind of guys do you hire? What makes a great male escort? How much do looks matter in this line of work?

Gentlemen4hire takes on escorts of all ages and walks of life. No one type suits all women. Younger good-looking guys will get more attention, but we’ve had plenty of guys in their 50’s and 60’s on the site that have done really well.

Looks obviously count, so take care of your overall presentation, dress sense, quality of photos, and description. Women want to see someone who has put a lot of effort into everything they do. Laziness is a very unattractive personality trait.

 

Would you date any of your customers if you hadn’t met them from work?

Yes, for sure, there’s always one or two each year that I will meet and have a deep connection with and attraction for.

Some women have wanted to move things to a relationship level rather than escort/customer, but all who have done this have been ones I’ve not really been interested in.

I’m an open-minded person, so there’s always a chance that I’ll end up settling down with someone I met through this job.

 

What do the women value the most from these guys? What “custom options” are the most popular?

They value most someone who will sit and listen to them, look interested, ask questions, and have positive energy. The physical attraction should be there already, seeing as they select an escort they like looks-wise.

In terms of “custom options,” it’s most often accompanying them for a meal out or going to a pub. They usually want to meet in a public place the first time for safety reasons. For regular clients, I often visit them at their home or hotel if it’s someone who is a frequent visitor to London.

Massages are a popular request. Luckily, after a few years of practice, I’ve become very good at this, so I never get any complaints!

 

What are some unreasonable and reasonable expectations of clients?

Most women are generally acceptable and grateful if you show up on time, look nice and clean and stick to the agreed plan. Some women can be very pushy and demanding, wanting to control exactly what you wear, how you look, and the topics of conversation.

 

Has the experience of being a male escort changed your opinion of women? What were your views before getting into the industry, and what are they now? Cute and fun, hard to please, unrelatable, unapproachable, or too horny for your liking?

Yes, I think my views have changed a bit in some ways. I see both sides of the argument a little more now. Previously, I felt that women were generally unreasonable and hard to please. Still, now I understand more about their motivations and how men can be just as absurd.

It’s also true that some women are much more confident than I realized. Some are not afraid to ask for what they want, whether materially, emotionally, or in sex and relationships. And many women have a dark side, just as men do, and have wild, beautiful desires and fantasies.

 

What qualities are a priority for women in a male escort?

I think being a good listener is very important. Generally, the women want to talk about their lives, problems, and aspirations. I see it as my job to listen and ask questions. They don’t want to hear about my life and issues. Hence, it’s most important to focus on what they’re saying and make them think they’ve got your undivided attention.

 

In your opinion, do you think being a male escort has made you a better man? Have you learned anything about yourself that you didn’t before? Has it given you valuable life experience? Has it made you more confident or wise in the ways of women?

Yes, it certainly has, without question. I’ve had many wonderful experiences and learned so much from many diverse people that I would have never met in my everyday life. My outlook on life has expanded. I’m more knowledgeable about many topics, and I’ve learned not to judge anyone purely based on looks. You never know what exciting stories people have to share until you get to know them.

About the Contributor: Simon Benn
	Simon Benn is the Manager at Gentlemen4Hire, the UK’s premier straight male escort company, which is the longest running male escort agency in the UK, and has been helping people become male escorts for over 10 years.